I am more than half way through radiation! I can't wait for this to be over. It seems in many ways to be a bigger burden than the chemo. First, it's daily. Second, the fatigue is incredible. And here I am complaining and I really shouldn't: I've had no bad burns; my skin has not opened into oozing sores; I can still wear clothes. I have five sessions this week and three the following week and I'm done!
At some point - likely next week - I'll have to go and see Dr Genest. He is available every Tuesday morning in the radiation lab, but I can't imagine what I'd say to him - so I haven't gone. I already know the areas that are being radiated. I know why my throat is so sore that they've cautioned me to be careful about food that is too spicy, too hot or too cold. I know why my daughter and friends have to keep drawing on me with sharpies. I know why my arm sometimes hurts and I know why I'm so tired. Unless the symptoms worsen alot, I'm good. I'll leave his time free for others, but I feel like I should put in at least one appearance.
My hair is growing back really quickly. Now when people see me who don't know me I can see them wondering whether I had cancer or whether I really like really short hair. It's a subtle difference in the face and the eyes but it's a difference and I've found that I really like people not knowing. I also really like this short hair. It doesn't show up well in photos but it's sort of a greyish brown and it's soft like a baby's hair. I keep trying to get it to grow back away from my face but it won't: it grows from the back forward. If I had a crown of leaves I could be an ancient Roman. Mom says that I have curly-qs at the back of my head but I can't see them.
I actually shaved my legs last week for the first time in about five months. I knew I was way out of practice when the next day I found a fine strip of long hair right down the middle of my shin:) It reminded me of Logan at a younger age mowing the lawn - when he said he was done there were all kinds of spots with noticably longer grass.
Monday, 28 May 2012
Thursday, 17 May 2012
Body art isn't always sexy
A dark, cozy room. Soft light emanating from the corners. You gaze into liquid brown eyes and gently curling auburn locks. Quiet music can be heard in the background if you can spare the attention. No words are exchanged. You unbutton your gown and lay down quietly on the bed, one arm raised. As you turn your head slightly there is another set of eyes, sparkling blue in the dimness. You close your eyes and sigh with contentment.
"Okay", says brown eyes, totally ruining the mood. "How are the markings today? Do we need to re-do any of the tape? We're going to do another set of x-rays tomorrw to make sure we're still lined up."
Both sets of eyes approach. Whey were there no male nurses on the chemo ward where one could stay fully clothed and yet the radiation techs are at least 50% male. Is it because they get to play with large machines all day in radiation?
Brown eyes and blue eyes, who have names that I can never remember, start undoing tape and drawing on me with Sharpies. I sigh again, not with contentment but with endurance. The drawing on me by two young men is not even the worst thing - although it has ruined me for body art adventures in the future (say with chocolate??!!). The worst thing about radiation I have discovered is that it's too short to actually fall asleep, but just long enough that I am on the cusp of dozing off when it's all over. Worst timing possible. Man, am I tired! Only when I was extremely burnt out from work did I ever before feel like this. It's a fatigue that has settled deep within my bones and even when I'm sleeping I dream about sleeping. The scary thing is that I've only just begun the radiation and my yard is a huge mud pile as I try to re-grade and re-seed it. I realize now that I should have started the back yard project at least a week earlier. I'm worried that I won't make it and I'll have another summer living in mud. It seems my days are filled with nothing but dirt and young men who draw on me but are as interested in me as they are in dirt. How did my life get so dull?
Radiation began for me on Wednesday, May 9. Barring any delays, my last session will be Tuesday, June 5 and already I cannot wait. You may be able to tell from the ever decreasing pace of the posts and other updates to the blog that I'm quickly getting bored with the whole cancer thing.
I'm finding the whole radiation process rather odd. I'm in the same room every session - room 6 and there are a couple of teams that rotate through that room but the people treating me are two or three from the same group of about 10 techs every time - dependiing who'se on shift. Sadly, I'm not there long enough to get to know them so the names are difficult for me to learn - but at least I recognize them all:)
With being in the same room with the same team, one might think that I would be scheduled at the same time every day. Alas, this logic has not yet penetrated to the hospital administration. I'm not even close to the same time on a regular basis, say, late morning or late afternoon. Hell, I'm not even always in the morning - late or early. The appointments are all over the map from 07:30 to 17:45 - and could be even later! Schedules are given to each patient on Thursday for the following week - but here's where it gets even better. They change the schedule - whenever they want!! At the end of each radiation session you have to check with the techs to see what time you're to come in the following day. It isn't always anywhere near the original time you've been given. It makes planning very difficult.
On Tuesdays I'm supposed to meet with Dr Genest, my radiation doc. He does have a set schedule - from 09:30 to 11:30 Tuesday morning. You don't get an appointment with him. Each patient - on becoming a radiation inmate - is given a cardboard card with the "tentative schedule" written inside and a computerized bar code on the front cover. You bring your jailhouse card with you to each visit and scan it into a computer terminal that tells the techs that you're there and ready to go. If you don't scan or if the scan doesn't work, you presumably can sit there forever, forgotten. When your doc is in, you are supposed to take the jailhouse card and leave it in a little slot with your hospital card and sit in a different waiting room until the doc's assistant calls you in. However, your radiation session on the day your doc is working the lab isn't even coordinated to the doc's hours. The result? Doc works from 09:30 to 11:30 and your radiation appt could be 13:30, 07:00, really anytime. This is what happened to me last Tuesday. While I originally had a rad appointment at 10:30, it was changed to mid-afternoon. No way was I going to sit there for hours nor make two trips to the hospital. I have too much to get finished before I get sick! I was only a week into the radiation by that point. Other than fatigue that was expected, I had no symptoms on Tuesday (I am just starting to feel the burn and my scar is rather bothered by treatment and my skin is taking on an odd texture - but still nothing major (knock on wood)). In the end I opted to forego seeing the doc and only went in for the radiation.
Now, I totally get that sometimes appointments have to change and things come up - but seriously? This scheduling is reedonkulous! And who needs emergency radiation? I suppose it could happen: you doctors out there can tell me who suddenly shows up who needs life saving radiation so badly that they can't wait until say 10:00 when there is a scheduled spot for emergency patients. There are about 8 or 9 radiation rooms. If they all had a 15 minute slot scheduled in on a rotating basis, could that not handle the "emergency" cases? If patients had the same time slot every day - could they not schedule around it or, heaven forbid, change places with another patient for one day? It's not even that the times are all different - it's that they change all the time! If major airlines can schedule aircraft all over the world (yes, I know airlines bugger up but if you consider the number of planes and connections they juggle....) surely some computer program can do a better job for the Ottawa Hospital. It can only be this disorganized intentionally........
When I was re-mareked on Wednesday before my first treatment, I couldn't believe what they did. First off, there are alot more marks than there were previously - and they're all in different places! There's now even one in my armpit. Joy. I have 7 green thingies on my covered in tape. These ones aren'et just crosses like the last ones either. I have what looks like a little target drawn on my chest, just right of centre, parallel to my armpit. The location means that it's almost always visible - unless I were to wear a turtleneck. Perhaps it's their way of punishing me for refusing the tatoos???
I finally got a reasonable answer to why they are so incredibly anal about the positioning of the radiation. I asked brown eyes about it and he said that a few milimeters wouldn't matter, but the more accurate they can be the better. The doctor has determined the area that actually needs to be radiated and they have enlarged that somewhat to take into account breathing during treatment (thanks for that) and any slight movements that may occur. However, they want to ensure they don't cause more harm than they fix. For example, they are radiating my neck and they would apparently like to stay away from my spine (thank you for that too) so they are very careful to ensure that they get what they want but not too much else. Makes sense - but still doesn't explain the need for tattoos.
So far, out of 6 treatments I've walked twice, ridden my bike once and driven 3 times. Not great given my goal of walking every day, but in my defence one car ride was b/c I was out biking until right before the appointment and another was caused by working hauling dirt until right before my appointment. So, I am still getting lots of good physical exercise in my days and that was the true goal. I do however enjoy the walks. I'm learning to love the slower pace and what I actually notice. I've seen a ton of butterflies. I don't know whether that's good news for the butterfly population or that I'm just going slowly enough to notice for the first time, but either way it lightens my heart every time one flutters by.
"Okay", says brown eyes, totally ruining the mood. "How are the markings today? Do we need to re-do any of the tape? We're going to do another set of x-rays tomorrw to make sure we're still lined up."
Both sets of eyes approach. Whey were there no male nurses on the chemo ward where one could stay fully clothed and yet the radiation techs are at least 50% male. Is it because they get to play with large machines all day in radiation?
Brown eyes and blue eyes, who have names that I can never remember, start undoing tape and drawing on me with Sharpies. I sigh again, not with contentment but with endurance. The drawing on me by two young men is not even the worst thing - although it has ruined me for body art adventures in the future (say with chocolate??!!). The worst thing about radiation I have discovered is that it's too short to actually fall asleep, but just long enough that I am on the cusp of dozing off when it's all over. Worst timing possible. Man, am I tired! Only when I was extremely burnt out from work did I ever before feel like this. It's a fatigue that has settled deep within my bones and even when I'm sleeping I dream about sleeping. The scary thing is that I've only just begun the radiation and my yard is a huge mud pile as I try to re-grade and re-seed it. I realize now that I should have started the back yard project at least a week earlier. I'm worried that I won't make it and I'll have another summer living in mud. It seems my days are filled with nothing but dirt and young men who draw on me but are as interested in me as they are in dirt. How did my life get so dull?
Radiation began for me on Wednesday, May 9. Barring any delays, my last session will be Tuesday, June 5 and already I cannot wait. You may be able to tell from the ever decreasing pace of the posts and other updates to the blog that I'm quickly getting bored with the whole cancer thing.
I'm finding the whole radiation process rather odd. I'm in the same room every session - room 6 and there are a couple of teams that rotate through that room but the people treating me are two or three from the same group of about 10 techs every time - dependiing who'se on shift. Sadly, I'm not there long enough to get to know them so the names are difficult for me to learn - but at least I recognize them all:)
With being in the same room with the same team, one might think that I would be scheduled at the same time every day. Alas, this logic has not yet penetrated to the hospital administration. I'm not even close to the same time on a regular basis, say, late morning or late afternoon. Hell, I'm not even always in the morning - late or early. The appointments are all over the map from 07:30 to 17:45 - and could be even later! Schedules are given to each patient on Thursday for the following week - but here's where it gets even better. They change the schedule - whenever they want!! At the end of each radiation session you have to check with the techs to see what time you're to come in the following day. It isn't always anywhere near the original time you've been given. It makes planning very difficult.
On Tuesdays I'm supposed to meet with Dr Genest, my radiation doc. He does have a set schedule - from 09:30 to 11:30 Tuesday morning. You don't get an appointment with him. Each patient - on becoming a radiation inmate - is given a cardboard card with the "tentative schedule" written inside and a computerized bar code on the front cover. You bring your jailhouse card with you to each visit and scan it into a computer terminal that tells the techs that you're there and ready to go. If you don't scan or if the scan doesn't work, you presumably can sit there forever, forgotten. When your doc is in, you are supposed to take the jailhouse card and leave it in a little slot with your hospital card and sit in a different waiting room until the doc's assistant calls you in. However, your radiation session on the day your doc is working the lab isn't even coordinated to the doc's hours. The result? Doc works from 09:30 to 11:30 and your radiation appt could be 13:30, 07:00, really anytime. This is what happened to me last Tuesday. While I originally had a rad appointment at 10:30, it was changed to mid-afternoon. No way was I going to sit there for hours nor make two trips to the hospital. I have too much to get finished before I get sick! I was only a week into the radiation by that point. Other than fatigue that was expected, I had no symptoms on Tuesday (I am just starting to feel the burn and my scar is rather bothered by treatment and my skin is taking on an odd texture - but still nothing major (knock on wood)). In the end I opted to forego seeing the doc and only went in for the radiation.
Now, I totally get that sometimes appointments have to change and things come up - but seriously? This scheduling is reedonkulous! And who needs emergency radiation? I suppose it could happen: you doctors out there can tell me who suddenly shows up who needs life saving radiation so badly that they can't wait until say 10:00 when there is a scheduled spot for emergency patients. There are about 8 or 9 radiation rooms. If they all had a 15 minute slot scheduled in on a rotating basis, could that not handle the "emergency" cases? If patients had the same time slot every day - could they not schedule around it or, heaven forbid, change places with another patient for one day? It's not even that the times are all different - it's that they change all the time! If major airlines can schedule aircraft all over the world (yes, I know airlines bugger up but if you consider the number of planes and connections they juggle....) surely some computer program can do a better job for the Ottawa Hospital. It can only be this disorganized intentionally........
When I was re-mareked on Wednesday before my first treatment, I couldn't believe what they did. First off, there are alot more marks than there were previously - and they're all in different places! There's now even one in my armpit. Joy. I have 7 green thingies on my covered in tape. These ones aren'et just crosses like the last ones either. I have what looks like a little target drawn on my chest, just right of centre, parallel to my armpit. The location means that it's almost always visible - unless I were to wear a turtleneck. Perhaps it's their way of punishing me for refusing the tatoos???
I finally got a reasonable answer to why they are so incredibly anal about the positioning of the radiation. I asked brown eyes about it and he said that a few milimeters wouldn't matter, but the more accurate they can be the better. The doctor has determined the area that actually needs to be radiated and they have enlarged that somewhat to take into account breathing during treatment (thanks for that) and any slight movements that may occur. However, they want to ensure they don't cause more harm than they fix. For example, they are radiating my neck and they would apparently like to stay away from my spine (thank you for that too) so they are very careful to ensure that they get what they want but not too much else. Makes sense - but still doesn't explain the need for tattoos.
So far, out of 6 treatments I've walked twice, ridden my bike once and driven 3 times. Not great given my goal of walking every day, but in my defence one car ride was b/c I was out biking until right before the appointment and another was caused by working hauling dirt until right before my appointment. So, I am still getting lots of good physical exercise in my days and that was the true goal. I do however enjoy the walks. I'm learning to love the slower pace and what I actually notice. I've seen a ton of butterflies. I don't know whether that's good news for the butterfly population or that I'm just going slowly enough to notice for the first time, but either way it lightens my heart every time one flutters by.
Monday, 7 May 2012
Markings, radiation, hair and trees! (and an all natural diet?)
I should have written this post over the weekend - but the weather was so glorious that I was out and about instead. So, my apologies for getting this off basically after the fact.
Friday I trundled into the hospital to have my markings re-done. Despite the assurances of the tech who did the original stuff, the surgical tape is definitely not made for persons who are not post-surgery. If you move, you sweat. If you sweat, they come off - quickly and they do not re-stick. When the tape comes off, it takes the marker with it. I even tried adding surgicial tape over and criss-crossing the stuff from the hospital. I ended up looking like a living, walking, talking mummy - but to no avail. Nothing would stick past the first good walk I had. Eventually I just ripped the whole thing off. The tape was folding into sharp edeges that dug into me and pulling on my scars.
They had told me that if the the markings didn't last I could just show up at the hospital and they would be re-done for me. So, without an appointment I packed a lunch and mid-afternoon snack, my water bottle and tube of henna and off I went. Without an appointment I figured I could be there many, many hours. I had learned that even with an appointment there was no guarantee of getting in without waiting a couple of hours, so who knew how long it could take when one was a bad, bad patient and lost one's marks.
It was a beautiful day and I enjoyed the walk up. When I explained to the receptionist what I was doing there she was rather skeptical. Not an auspicious beginning. She called someone however and seemed surprised by what she heard but took me immediately to Exam Room 2 and told me that someone would be in presently. Exam Room 2 was not what I was expecting. The initial markings, which essentially had to be done again from scratch, required that I lay on a table and they used laser beams to measure. This was a bare exam room. Somehow we had gotten our wires crossed - this was not going to work. Had no one ever before completely lost their markings? I don't think it's possible for them to last two full weeks even under ordinary circumstances - like with a good, good patient who doesn't sweat them off.
In came Linda, with marker and large bandage type things in hand. I looked at here skeptically, gave her my best smile and confessed that the markings weren't merely faded - they were gone. I waited for sentencing to be announced. "Well," she began, "To fix that requires the use of (insert noun for special marking machine which I have forgotten) and it's down for a software upgrade. It won't be back on line until Wednesday so we'll have to schedule you in for then." Uh oh, radiation scheduled to begin Monday! So, in the end everything had to be postponed until Wednesday when the markings can be re-done.
Linda shot down my henna idea, saying that it wasn't protocol and might smudge. Honestly, I think the henna option is still much better. It's a natural product and the lines it can make are a heck of alot more fine than the Sharpie. I was still planning to use the henna on my own but I didn't share that with Linda. Instead I asked, "How are the markings going to last for four weeks? They, and the tape barely last four days." and Linda came up with the obvious solution. The nurses who will be taking care of me during the radiation sessions will re-do the markings and change the tape when necessary. So, once radiation acgtually starts, there should be no worries for me about the markings. First, I'm told that I will be so tired and burnt that I won't be doing much sweating. Second, even if I do, they'll be taken care of daily by the nurses. Awesome. My only remaining question is why, as soon as I told them that I wasn't taking the tattoos, they didn't just schedule me for markings just prior to radiation beginning? Hmmm.
In considering all this marking stuff, someone actually suggested to me that I should consider using a product that is apparently used to write on steel - during construction projects or some such thing. Seriously? I'm looking for alternatives to the chemicals found in Sharpies that would be acceptable to the hospital. But, I was told, this product takes weeks to get off your skin if you are unfortunate enough to get it on your skin! Yes, that would work from the aspect of semi-permanency, but I'm not intested in more poison! Also, even assuming that I could figure out what the hell this stuff is (I was strongly urged to spend my precious time researching the damn thing) and agree to have it put on my skin for it to seep into my body because more poison is what I really need these days, I doubt that I could buy it at Staples nor convince the hospital that it should be the new standard in their protocols! Focus people!
Tree update before hair: The trees are gone! I used Wright Tree Service and they were great. Four men showed up Thursday morning. Because of all of the rain we've been having, their schedule was out of whack so I didn't really have any notice. Rob left a message Wednesday and I called them Thursday morning and they were able to come right over. First, they were hysterically funny. Second, they did a great job. They were not able to do the most aesthetically pleasing job due to the lack of cooperation from my neighbour, but they totally understood my need to strictly adhere to the property line and they offered advice and suggestions on how to go about it. It was quite an operation and I cannot believe the amount of foliage that was removed. When it was all on the ground it seemed like alot more than it did up in the air!
I was able to give my neighbours behind me a few hours notice so that they could move their cars. They were so good about it they even offered to share the cost of the one tree on my property that needed to be removed that overhung their yard. Wow, what a contrast to my crazy next door neighbour and a delightful surprise:)
My hair is growing at an awesome rate! Laurie and I were enjoying a relaxing few minutes on Saturday in my now sunny back yard (sadly the neighbour was not there to see me actually using my yard - he may have even approved) and we were comparing growing speeds. Laurie figures that I'll have a full head of long locks before hers grows another inch:) The race is on. On Sunday I noticed that I have a full row of top and bottom eye lashes now! This is wonderful b/c my lashes are so pale that I really need masscara to give my eyes definition. The lashes are tiny - very short - but a whole row is simply awesome and I'm so thrilled to have progress there. It's another corner that I have turned.
Syd came home last night from a weekend with her dad and announced that she was tired of eating junk food! For those of you who don't know, that poor child has inherited two of my worst traites: she'd prefer to sit and read more than anything else in life; and, she LOVES her junk food. This was therefore quite a surprise. I asked her what she had in mind and she outlined quite a strict regime for us. I have misgivings about our ability to do this: no sugar other than naturally occuring sugar (this will be the biggest hurdle); no fat (or only the very minimum); no bread products (yikes!); only lean meats; absolutely no junk food; only no fat dairy. Some of these we already do and some of these are killers. When I got up (after noon because i was up all night with pain in my hip) I remembered to have my coffee without added sugar - but then proceeded to have a pita with all natural peanut butter and jam! Alas! When Syd got home from school I asked how she had done and she confessed to having a sub, a chocolate bar and a bag of chips today! I was shocked by it - even if she hadn't proposed this new regime I am surprised by how much junk she can put away in a 50 minute lunch break. I guess it is time to get on top of this - for both our sakes. Logan of course is exempt - except that he'll be eating better meals at home. He is trying desperately to gain weight for rowing.
In the end, after the steel marker, the tree and trench issues and everything else that's come at me, I've decided that the problem is not me making changes and continuuing to laugh at all the things that I find ridiculous - it's the refusal of others to let me laugh that is the problem. So, I've made a gorgeous fruit salad for Syd and her friend as an after school snack and I'm going out to my garden to begin work on my plantings - something that I truly enjoy (but am terrible at) and in the past haven't done enough of - and I'll keep focusing on ways to make my life better and more full of laughter. Others can join me in that journey - or not:)
Friday I trundled into the hospital to have my markings re-done. Despite the assurances of the tech who did the original stuff, the surgical tape is definitely not made for persons who are not post-surgery. If you move, you sweat. If you sweat, they come off - quickly and they do not re-stick. When the tape comes off, it takes the marker with it. I even tried adding surgicial tape over and criss-crossing the stuff from the hospital. I ended up looking like a living, walking, talking mummy - but to no avail. Nothing would stick past the first good walk I had. Eventually I just ripped the whole thing off. The tape was folding into sharp edeges that dug into me and pulling on my scars.
They had told me that if the the markings didn't last I could just show up at the hospital and they would be re-done for me. So, without an appointment I packed a lunch and mid-afternoon snack, my water bottle and tube of henna and off I went. Without an appointment I figured I could be there many, many hours. I had learned that even with an appointment there was no guarantee of getting in without waiting a couple of hours, so who knew how long it could take when one was a bad, bad patient and lost one's marks.
It was a beautiful day and I enjoyed the walk up. When I explained to the receptionist what I was doing there she was rather skeptical. Not an auspicious beginning. She called someone however and seemed surprised by what she heard but took me immediately to Exam Room 2 and told me that someone would be in presently. Exam Room 2 was not what I was expecting. The initial markings, which essentially had to be done again from scratch, required that I lay on a table and they used laser beams to measure. This was a bare exam room. Somehow we had gotten our wires crossed - this was not going to work. Had no one ever before completely lost their markings? I don't think it's possible for them to last two full weeks even under ordinary circumstances - like with a good, good patient who doesn't sweat them off.
In came Linda, with marker and large bandage type things in hand. I looked at here skeptically, gave her my best smile and confessed that the markings weren't merely faded - they were gone. I waited for sentencing to be announced. "Well," she began, "To fix that requires the use of (insert noun for special marking machine which I have forgotten) and it's down for a software upgrade. It won't be back on line until Wednesday so we'll have to schedule you in for then." Uh oh, radiation scheduled to begin Monday! So, in the end everything had to be postponed until Wednesday when the markings can be re-done.
Linda shot down my henna idea, saying that it wasn't protocol and might smudge. Honestly, I think the henna option is still much better. It's a natural product and the lines it can make are a heck of alot more fine than the Sharpie. I was still planning to use the henna on my own but I didn't share that with Linda. Instead I asked, "How are the markings going to last for four weeks? They, and the tape barely last four days." and Linda came up with the obvious solution. The nurses who will be taking care of me during the radiation sessions will re-do the markings and change the tape when necessary. So, once radiation acgtually starts, there should be no worries for me about the markings. First, I'm told that I will be so tired and burnt that I won't be doing much sweating. Second, even if I do, they'll be taken care of daily by the nurses. Awesome. My only remaining question is why, as soon as I told them that I wasn't taking the tattoos, they didn't just schedule me for markings just prior to radiation beginning? Hmmm.
In considering all this marking stuff, someone actually suggested to me that I should consider using a product that is apparently used to write on steel - during construction projects or some such thing. Seriously? I'm looking for alternatives to the chemicals found in Sharpies that would be acceptable to the hospital. But, I was told, this product takes weeks to get off your skin if you are unfortunate enough to get it on your skin! Yes, that would work from the aspect of semi-permanency, but I'm not intested in more poison! Also, even assuming that I could figure out what the hell this stuff is (I was strongly urged to spend my precious time researching the damn thing) and agree to have it put on my skin for it to seep into my body because more poison is what I really need these days, I doubt that I could buy it at Staples nor convince the hospital that it should be the new standard in their protocols! Focus people!
Tree update before hair: The trees are gone! I used Wright Tree Service and they were great. Four men showed up Thursday morning. Because of all of the rain we've been having, their schedule was out of whack so I didn't really have any notice. Rob left a message Wednesday and I called them Thursday morning and they were able to come right over. First, they were hysterically funny. Second, they did a great job. They were not able to do the most aesthetically pleasing job due to the lack of cooperation from my neighbour, but they totally understood my need to strictly adhere to the property line and they offered advice and suggestions on how to go about it. It was quite an operation and I cannot believe the amount of foliage that was removed. When it was all on the ground it seemed like alot more than it did up in the air!
I was able to give my neighbours behind me a few hours notice so that they could move their cars. They were so good about it they even offered to share the cost of the one tree on my property that needed to be removed that overhung their yard. Wow, what a contrast to my crazy next door neighbour and a delightful surprise:)
My hair is growing at an awesome rate! Laurie and I were enjoying a relaxing few minutes on Saturday in my now sunny back yard (sadly the neighbour was not there to see me actually using my yard - he may have even approved) and we were comparing growing speeds. Laurie figures that I'll have a full head of long locks before hers grows another inch:) The race is on. On Sunday I noticed that I have a full row of top and bottom eye lashes now! This is wonderful b/c my lashes are so pale that I really need masscara to give my eyes definition. The lashes are tiny - very short - but a whole row is simply awesome and I'm so thrilled to have progress there. It's another corner that I have turned.
Syd came home last night from a weekend with her dad and announced that she was tired of eating junk food! For those of you who don't know, that poor child has inherited two of my worst traites: she'd prefer to sit and read more than anything else in life; and, she LOVES her junk food. This was therefore quite a surprise. I asked her what she had in mind and she outlined quite a strict regime for us. I have misgivings about our ability to do this: no sugar other than naturally occuring sugar (this will be the biggest hurdle); no fat (or only the very minimum); no bread products (yikes!); only lean meats; absolutely no junk food; only no fat dairy. Some of these we already do and some of these are killers. When I got up (after noon because i was up all night with pain in my hip) I remembered to have my coffee without added sugar - but then proceeded to have a pita with all natural peanut butter and jam! Alas! When Syd got home from school I asked how she had done and she confessed to having a sub, a chocolate bar and a bag of chips today! I was shocked by it - even if she hadn't proposed this new regime I am surprised by how much junk she can put away in a 50 minute lunch break. I guess it is time to get on top of this - for both our sakes. Logan of course is exempt - except that he'll be eating better meals at home. He is trying desperately to gain weight for rowing.
In the end, after the steel marker, the tree and trench issues and everything else that's come at me, I've decided that the problem is not me making changes and continuuing to laugh at all the things that I find ridiculous - it's the refusal of others to let me laugh that is the problem. So, I've made a gorgeous fruit salad for Syd and her friend as an after school snack and I'm going out to my garden to begin work on my plantings - something that I truly enjoy (but am terrible at) and in the past haven't done enough of - and I'll keep focusing on ways to make my life better and more full of laughter. Others can join me in that journey - or not:)
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